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I don't think those are the rules of feminism so much as the rules of human decency. That's some Dawson-Joey-Pacey kind of betrayal, and I can only imagine the level of hurt you've been feeling. We don't betray the ones we love the most, or at least we try not to!I dealt with a similar sort of situation with an ex and a best friend. I understand that no one is perfect and that shit does, in fact, sometimes happen, but your best friend and your ex hooking up is a BIG dump to take.And that created a whole shitshow of drama and insecurity for me. While I wouldn't mind seeing my ex go hook up and be happy with a stranger, there is an undeniable sting when it's with someone you know. Maybe if we didn't have the capacity to feel jealousy and insecurity, we could all just have a big happy orgy. It didn't feel good worrying if he would trade in our friendship just for a forbidden make out with my best friend. And I don't think you should ever apologize or justify that sting.

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She's a tech geek at heart, but loves telling it like it is when it comes to love, beauty and style.

You’ve probably had a thing for the guy while he was with your best friend. Never, under any circumstances, try to date the ex right after they broke up. Crystal Crowder Crystal Crowder is a freelance writer and blogger.

I don’t care how much you think you like this guy, DON’T DATE HIM. It’s not just disrespectful to your best friend, but you’re disrespecting yourself. Besides, it’ll be over the moment you catch him with someone else.

If you love your best friend far more than her ex, do the right thing and find another guy. She's enjoys writing music, poetry and fiction and hopes to have her first novel out soon.

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