Friends before dating love
Queer communities are often small and insular, and once you've found one, you tend to hold on to it for dear life.
It's difficult to meet people you're romantically interested in beyond an already-defined circle, and outside of your city's queer scene, most people you run into are likely to be straight.
As I read through comments about safety (bring mace, schedule a safety call, send a picture of him and your location to someone you trust), and finding…
Social media today isn’t what it was, say, 10 years ago.
This rule is almost never stated or enforced among queer communities.
If you're gay, you will almost inevitably date a friend's ex at some point.
We know our backstories will be tangled and intertwined.
They dated casually for a few weeks before they split up and we got together, and three years later the same friend gave one of the readings at our wedding. It's common to assume that anything shared with you is by default shared with your partner as well; however, your friend might be much less comfortable speaking to you in confidence if she thought the details of her personal life were going to be relayed to someone who used to share her toothbrush.
They believe this is something everybody knows, that they're just following the rules.
What I've noticed, though, is that every person I've heard espouse this worldview was straight.
Dating alert: Whether your date does or doesn’t ask you questions about yourself and your overall life means a lot.
This issue is one of those you may not think about often, but taking a moment to reflect on it is important. The beginning of online messaging with someone new can be incredibly exciting and fun.